Move Over Versace

There are many people in the world who would make excellent fashion icons. But just because someone is famous, it does not mean the world should seek to emulate their fashion style. For example, nobody should try to dress like the following people: Kirsten Dunst, Sienna Miller, either of the Olson Twins, Michael Madsen, Madonna, Johnny Depp, Dick Cheney, Condoleeza Rice, anybody from the 1970s.

But someone has gone a step further. There I was, walking the two blocks to Au Bon Pain to get a delicious bagel and I spy with my little eye someone taking their fashion cues from JACK FUCKING ABRAMOFF. That's right, some random business man was wearing the Abramoff classic.

Now, in case you live outside the Metro area and are ignorant as to who I mean, I will elaborate. Jack Abramoff is the lobbyist who is currently being prosecuted/persecuted (hee) for bribing Congressmen with trips to Scotland, cash, and all sorts of pork products. And this is how he dresses for court:



I just...don't...what...why...WTF, random business man on street, WTF? He had it all folks, the black trench coat, the fedora placed just so it would cover his shifty eyes...what was he thinking? If we as a culture have learned anything in the past ten years it is that big trench coats do not inspire confidence, in fact they usually make people want to search you for weapons. So why would you choose to model yourself after the man who has come to represent all that is corrupt with DC? I thought about crossing to the other side of the street when I saw this guy coming because it was so disconcerting.

So be on the look-out folks. New for spring 2006: the trench coat/fedora combo. Just what every well-dressed crook will be wearing.

Currently Reading: "Knife of Dreams", by Robert Jordan (he's back on track!)

Currently Listening to: "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire Soundtrack"